Dating and the random world of table football.

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Okay, so I was not going to share this but by popular demand I apparently owe it to female kind to share one of my more random dates...

So I met this one on a fitness website - designed for people who are into exercise... I love rowing so I thought that a man who exercised would appeal to me. Imagine this - the moment I press click to join the website - the hottest bloke you could imagine instantly contacted me. I thought the heavens were smiling on me. He was beautiful, could type a sentence and was taller than me... Wow, wow and triple wow. At this point it is customary for me to look over my shoulder and wonder whether there is some kind of joke involved... Nope... Straight away we began to chat and he actually seemed nice. Again wooooooooooooooooooop! There had to be something.
I don't know about anyone else but I am searching for that chemical attraction and I thought - imagine - this could be it.

So after a heavy session of rowing which resulted in bleeding palms and blisters, I patched myself up with elastoplast and headed for the date. I know I am classy girl but if men can do the Italian shower with the Linx affect a woman can do the same with impulse - true love... Oh yes! So I there I am smelling of true love with a hint of perspiration and there he is... My goodness he was beautiful, tall, and... when he open his mouth well it was apparent that he had been granted the gift of beauty without the gift of intellect. He was such a nice chap but during the conversation he asked me to explain some of the words I was using...

Further into the date he showed me a picture of his newly decorated bedroom - it was decked out in Liverpool football posters, curtains and matching bedspread. To top it off there was a table football table beside his bed. He was so lovely but he did not get the 'so is that how you do foreplay joke?' I then had numerous visions of romantic moments with the Liverpool team gazind down from the wall. Then on top of that I became rather amused about being woken up in the night - 'shall we have a quickie - a game of table football.' Obviously my date was not so amused and the fact I was shaking with laughter probably did not appeal... Oh well t'is life. We all have our own special ways of doing things so I did not show him a picture of my bedroom with the taxidermied squirrels - only joking... But imagine if I had come back with a picture like that - all these stuffed squirrels... Right back to normal life.
Now with my previous blogs I always have a moral of the story and on my useless dates I have a summary. So the summary went like this - I feel that you and I have different tastes and I don't feel any chemistry. I don't think you feel it either. Good luck with finding the right one.
I was surprised to have a summary response from the beautiful man - 'I am glad you said that - I don't think I could go out with a girl with bigger biceps than me who is more intelligent. I liked meeting you though - but I feel stupid now. I always thought I was clever until I met you. Now I know I'm not...' Imagine how bad I felt then.

Moral of the story - dating sites for fit men do have fit men - however they may also have table football beside the bed.

When dating a fit man do not compare biceps especially if yours are bigger.
When dating any man do not make him feel stupid even if he is.



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Bottom kicking, reviews and a general update...

Okay, okay, I know... Yes I have been crap at keeping this updated but there are only so many plates a person can spin on a stick simultaneously!
The last months have looked like this - train for rowing competitions, work full time, date a dickhead - teach a creative writing course, edit a book, write a book and on top of all that go to work full time... Can you forgive me for not being able to blog too? As much as I wanted to share dickhead details, I have kept it to myself. I still cannot understand men and now my learning had taken a whole new tangent - it is the learning that a man can actually be an emotional black hole and a mental enigma... Fascinating or infuriating - I will leave that to you...



So the reason that I am back is to share my excitement - I have a review on the Resonance from a teen book reviewer who gave it 8/10 - bear in mind I am up against the big boys and girls of publishing... So that has made me very very very happy... I am doing a little dance now - dad dancing with a bit of break dancing with a hint of typing...

The link is as follows: http://www.flamingnet.com/​bookreviews/newreviews/​newbookreview.cfm?title=The Resonance (eBook)

So the teaching has been one of the best things I could do - it made me re-teach myself all the things I had not been doing. Yes - it also coincided with the Resonance edit. I realised that the art of description is paramount. It is something that I had never considered so important. Then there I am guiding a lesson on description and I think - oh shouldn't I be doing this... Oops - shhh don't tell anyone... So with that in mind I am now re-editing Goylegate to the heady heights of my own approval with descriptions that will enable visions of both horror and inspiration. I love it!